we're not even half way to the airport and I'm already choking back tears
October 2011
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl,
year after year.
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here..
Sebba just ate his last kebab.
I saw my reflection on the train, and I looked incredibly sad, so I smiled and I looked even sadder.
“Nothing is after all just nothing. It cannot be a place that resembles an idea of nothingness. A place involves area, or extension. It is defined by coordinates and boundaries. It is not nothing. It is room. Nothing has no room, or can anything be located within nothing. Nothing cannot have an inside or an outside. It cannot destroy, swallow, or terminate. As nothing, it can have no energy or effect. As nothing it cannot be a thing, a realm, a state, or anything. It is absolutely nothing to fear. It is nothing to hope for.”
—Bardo thos grol, bardo (Tibetan Book of the Dead)
Jason was the only one who asked me anything..
ask me questions, you fuckers.
FINE! 11
Would I rather be stranded on a desert island with someone I love for ten years or someone I hate for a month? Explain why.
Someone I hate for a month. I could grow to like them, or at least tolerate them just via common experience, but if I was stuck with one person for ten years, no matter how much I loved them in the beginning I would hate them by the end .. in fact I’d probably kill them and eat them to survive, and justify it by thinking that “it’s what they would have wanted, we were in love”
THESE ARE ACTUALLY GOOD QUESTIONS →
theslappee.tumblr.com
- the person i like and why i like them.
- a famous person i’ve been compared to.
- 5 things that irritate me about the same sex/opposite sex.
- the best thing that has happened to me this week.
- weird things i do when i’m alone.
- how i’d spend ten thousand bucks.
- things i like and things i don’t like about the way i look.
- my last night out in detail.
- something that makes me sad when i think about it.
- something i’ve lied about.
- would i rather be stranded on a desert island with someone i love for ten years or someone i hate for a month? explain why.
- something i’m currently worrying about.
- one person from tumblr i’d throw off a cliff, one i’d marry and one i’d fuck.
- something i do without realising.
- lyrics that apply to my current situation/mood.
- a drunken story.
- something i regret.
- post a picture of myself.
- my longest relationship and who it was with.
- press ctrl v and post.
- post a bit of my last IM convo.
- 5 things i want to change.
- my view on being tumblr famous.
- someone i’d like to be for a day and why.
- 5 things within touching distance.
- story of my first kiss.
people should actually ask me some of this shit… please & thanks
I'm the kind of person you stay friends with even if your mother hates me.
Hahaha aww, the amount of giggleface I had was astonishing
oh Blerg, I was feeling better and then I saw this and I hate everything again.
Feelings are stupid and should just go away because I am starting to annoying even myself now.
I didn't know what time it was, and therefore did not know what day it was, so the first thing I said when I turned 22 was "we need some cheese with sauce"
I had a world where all you needed was that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite.
I’m hysterical, I’m having hysterics. When I get like this, I can’t stop.
..I’M WET! I’M WET!
I’m hysterical!
..I’M IN PAIN! I’M IN PAIN!
And I’m wet and I’m still hysterical!
I need to find someone to talk to who isn’t in the middle of all the shit my life has turned into.
I can’t talk to the person who usually makes life worth living because they called me at 2am on my birthday to inform me that we could no know each other, because I am ruining their life simply by existing and that we can’t be friends until I turn into a growed-up.
So I guess we’re never seeing each other again, which is just super.
The other day a perfect stranger told me I should seek out a good psychologist, emphasis on good.
I hate everything, I can’t sleep, I have to get up early to clean the car, I don’t want to exist, let alone clean, God kill me know, they made me promise I “wouldn’t do anything silly” but then again they promised they weren’t going anywhere and that I would have the best birthday ever, so I guess we don’t take promises seriously these days, no jkjkjklololol, I’m not going to kill myself over this, that would be too emo, even for me. I’m just going to live blog my decent into self absorbed pathetic madness until I forget what feelings are.
I wish I could just switch off.
I’m in the kitchen, I start crying.
I’m drying my hair, I start crying.
I’m driving with my brother, I start crying.
I’m on the bus, I start crying.
I’m watching friends, I start crying.
I try to sleep, I start crying.
I wake up, I start crying.
I think about how nice the night is, I start crying.
I think about how to get rid of the bugs, I start crying.
My phone goes off, I start crying.
I’m alone for more than ten seconds, I start crying.
I think about how annoying I am with all this crying business, I start crying.
